"I am so much better than before"

Can I just say how much I love the Legally Blonde: The Musical soundtrack?  This may sound cheesy, but it's kind of inspirational, particularly "So Much Better," when Elle gets the internship and realizes that she's more than just the blonde sorority girl that Warner dumped.  I sort of feel like that right now, so I love the pride she feels in herself and the bit of healthy revenge she has toward Warner and Vivian.  This soundtrack is the only CD that I can handle listening to right now.  I don't even want to listen to break up songs, which I normally love!  Oh well, here is my favorite song of the moment:

All of this time I planned

I'd be patient and

You would love me again

You'd come to respect my mind

And at last you'd find

You could love me again

And I have turned my whole world upside down

Trying not to let you go

Watching you walk away

Is like a fatal blow

Whoa!

Is that my name up on that list?

Does someone know that I exist?

Is this a mistake?

Am I even awake?

Pinch me now to make sure - ow!

Yes that's my name in black and white

Maybe I'm doing something right

Wow, I feel so much better than before

Warner!

Sorry I've been a pest

But I guess my best

Wasn't working for you

But looks like I found a cure

And I so look forward to working with you

Hey remember when we spent spring break

In the hot tub every night

You said nothing else

Would ever feel so right

Well this might!

Seeing my name up on that list

That beats the first time that we kissed

You thought I was dumb

But I think that somebody's judgement was poor

Seeing my name in black and white

It's like making love with you all night

No wait!  It feels so much better

Hello, much better

It's oh, oh, oh, oh, OH - much better

'Cause I am so much better than before

Maybe she's what you prefer

But hey, last year I was her

Maybe you will change your mind

But you might look up to find

I've gone on to better things

Better jobs or bigger rings

I don't have the time to cry

I'm too busy loving my name up on that list

Kind of a cool ironic twist

Who else can I tell?

Ooh wait, where's my cell?

Mom will fall on the floor

Hey Mom!

Look at my name in black and white

Your daughter's doing something right

I feel so much better

I'll be there on Monday nine o' clock

And we will see who walks the walk

No no I can't wait

I will be there at eight

When they unlock the door

Oh oh!

I'll even dress in black and white

You see I have not begun to fight

And you'll go OH much better

Hello, much better

And soon all y'all gonna know much better

I am so much better

I am so much better

I am so much better than before!

La la la

I should be going to bed right now, but I'm not tired.  Naturally, I was exhausted at 7pm and therefore dozed in my chair for 15 minutes which rejuvenated me enough so that I'm not tired now at 11:30pm.  Well, I don't suppose that caramel frappuccino helped either. :)

I'm also going back and forth about a boy.  Isn't that always how it is?  To trust or not to trust.  Is he telling me the truth or just what I want to hear so he can get what he wants?  I need a good night's sleep to escape these thoughts, but obviously from the above paragraph, I'm having trouble achieving that.

Ooh wait, I think I'm starting to feel tired...

Whenever I have a problem that I want to escape, I always imagine some alternate life where I don't have to deal with it.  Unfortunately, as I've gotten older that has become more difficult to do as I see things more realistically.  I can't just pretend to be a princess of one kingdom while a prince from another kingdom woos me (a scenario I played out often).  Now I think of what countries actually have royalty, instead of being able to just imagine out my own countries/kingdoms.  (I actually still have a map of one such kingdom in an old notebook.)  I loved creating my imaginary worlds and I miss that I can't do that anymore.  Maybe that's why I like to write.  Though I'm not in them, these worlds are still created and I can put my own characters into them.  And one of those characters always has red hair. :)

I have three ideas that I'm working on right now, but I'm trying to figure out which I should put first.

1) I have 10,000 words on this one, but it needs to be redone to better fit its audience.  And the outline isn't complete because I'm not quite sure how to solve the major issue.

2) About 7,000 words written and only basic revision is needed.  I just recently got some new ideas for this one, but I'm not sure if the overall story is strong enough and what else I should put into it to make the stakes higher for the main character.

3) More difficult to tackle, with a rotating POV between 4 girls.  I have each of their story lines completely outlined, plus an overall situation to tie them together, but I'm not sure how to weave the stories together.

I need to find a writing partner or group to help me figure this out.  It's so difficult to analyze what needs to be done on my own!

Well, at least I'm distracted from my unpleasant situation.  But I won't go to sleep any easier with my brain active with stories. :)